Chester “Cheezer” Carter
Abandoned as a newborn.
Raised in an orphanage / mental hospital.
Has no luck with women.
Has a bit of a drug and alcohol problem.
Slowly losing his grip on reality.
May be the most important person who ever lived.
Sits and tells his life story in an airport bar to a bunch of people who couldn’t care less.

The Kamikaze Kid
An imaginary cowboy who lives inside Chester’s head and rides upon a dinosaur.
Suffers from violent mood swings.

Jonathan Picanos
A founding member of The Farmland Spiritual Cooperative.
Also, a serial killer who went to the chair in the mid-seventies.
Haunts the orphanage Chester grew up in.

Betty
Bartender of the airport bar where Chester is drinking.
Budding poet.
Hates her job.

Detectives Frank and Benny
Two cops on a stakeout, looking out for “The Man”.
Now, resurrected servants of reality.

The Hungry Husband and Wife
Live on a patch of barren land.
They are very hungry.

Jack Hallaway and Emily Watson
Two American kids trying to do the best they can.

Raoul
Baggage handler for Delta Airlines.
A pain in the ass.

Chester’s demon

The Boys From Greybridge

Hates Chester. Beats the crap out of him all the time.

David Ects

A washed up celebrity.

Eliza Dorne

The Assassin

Senator MacGonagle

The target.

Rabbits

MUNG.

Hitmen and Bodyguards for “The Reverend”.

You never know when one might show up.

The Brethren

A strict group of religious followers. Beat the shit out of Chester as he was growing up.

Doug Hoffman
Dating Sean.
Big Motherfucker.
Do not fuck with Doug.

Sean MacInery
Dating Doug.

Dr. Mary Bannon

Chester’s personal psychologist

Paul and Bongo Betty

Friends of Doug and Sean. Forces of nature.

Robert O’Den

The richest man in the nameless airport bar. Has a disgusting secret.

Detective Jake Goner

A good cop hot on the trail of those who murdered Frank and Benny.